Week 2

i have come to realize that week 2 is infinitely harder than week 1 whenever trying to start or break habits... and this was no different for me this week.  i will definitely cut myself some slack though because my entire life and schedule was turned upside down.  i found out that my grandfather was a lot worse than we thought he was, and he eventually passed away Friday morning, one day shy of his 82 birthday.  it was also AIMS (state testing) week at school and my entire schedule was completely messed up, resulting in juggling Laela around a little bit and me having to rush home at the end of the day.

that being said, i did NOT do so well with my goals this week.

Goal 1: work out 4 times a week ------> i worked out twice
Goal 2: read my scriptures at least ten minutes every day ------> i read three out of seven days
Goal 3: technology fast -----> i struggled with this one.  i was actually thinking of revising my guidelines to make it a little more "realistic" (read: easy) for myself to follow, but not i'm rethinking that.  i really don't think that my expectations are really all that difficult to meet.  probably the only 1 hour of tv would need to be extended a little bit because sometimes shows are two hours long (an hour and a half with my DVR), so i'm thinking i'll limit myself to one show instead of one hour.
Goal 4: put my clothes away after work -----> FAIL!  haha!  i did a teensy bit better, but i'm definitely staring at today's clothes hanging over my bed, and i also have clothes piled in the bathroom still.

needless to say i'm not going to pile more goals onto myself when i didn't even do a great job this week.  so, i'm going to work on those 4 goals again this week.

i'm also going to be working on actually trying to pinpoint the catalyst for my depression.  the little sister has a kick butt job at this place called New Haven, which is a treatment center for girls that struggle with all sorts of things in their lives.  they have this cool therapy technique where they pinpoint the girls' "core issue."  it's a struggle, and many times it is heart wrenching, however this in turn makes it much easier for these girls to overcome their issues.  i'm going to be watching for moments where i can feel myself sinking into a depressed state and make note of what was going on, or what happened, to push me over the edge.  when we go to Florida for my granddad's memorial service in three weeks i will be having a "core issue" discussion with kaycie in order to uncover mine and help with my healing process.  i know it's going to be uncomfortable, but i'm excited to make some progress on the inside as well as the outside.

have a fantastic week!!